Line Dancing Podcasts
ECW on SciFi for August 21st, 2007
Kendo Sticks and Microphones
So the show starts with Estrada in the ring, which is full of weapons. With no surprise, the first match with extreme rules, which brings a nice cheer from the crowd. He's gonna handle Justin Robert's duties for this match apparently as he introduces the wrestlers. Big Daddy V over Tommy Dreamer by Samoan drop through a table Dreamer doesn't look very enthusiastic. Remember, this is the guy who didn't blink at fighting the Big Show in the first few weeks of ECW to welcome his to the program. Dreamer starts in on V, but attempts a body slam and gets crushed for his troubles. He goes for the kendo stick but it gets snapped in two. V crushes Dreamer with a chair, wedges a shopping cart in the corner and slams Dreamer, following that up withh tossing him into the cart in the corner. V sets up Dreamer in the corner and runs to splash him, but Dreamer moves out of the way, which gives him time to grab a table, but he gets cut off before he can get back into the ring. V sends him back into the ring and follows with a few headbutts, then grabs the table Dreamer brought into the ring. The table's set up in the middle of the ring and Dreamer's got a trash can, which does NOTHING to V. V throws Dreamer to the ropes and hits a Samoan drop onto the table for the three count. Uh oh. Vince is on the program tonight. Dammit. We're reminded that there's an ECW title match this weekend and this time we're shown a nice little package on C.M. Punk. But back to Vince, who is still looking for his kid with the Coach at his side. Coach hints that there's a wrestler that fits the bill, and it's Balls Mahoney! Balls and Vince have a pretty funny exchange that ends with Vince yelling "I HAVE NO BALLS" at Balls Mahoney. That's pretty good stuff. I'm informed that was shot at Saturday Night's Main Event, but not shown on the broadcast. Oh well, still funny. Elijah Burke vs. Balls Mahoney Balls has pretty good crowd support. Match starts with a combo of headlocks and hammer locks til Balls throws Burke to the ropes and sholder blocks him down. Balls gets Burke from behind in a reverse waist lock and Elijah reverses it into a hammer lock. Balls reverses it, Burke runs to the ropes and gets hit with a HARD arm drag by Balls. Balls goes for the punches, but Burke cuts it short with a punch from underneath and sends hi shoulder first into the ring post. Elijah brings a towel into the ring, but the ref tyakes it away long enough for Burke to get behind him and throw Balls' leg into the post. Elijah hits the hanging elbow and focuses on Balls' shoulder. Burke pulls on Balls arm, which gets the crowd behind him, which of course means his rally will be cut short, and it is. An inside cradle on Burke gets a two after the both miss elbows on the canvas. TWO! Balls hits Burke with some punches and a clothesline, which leads to THE punches, which Balls hits all of them. Burke walks into a big spinebuster, but it only gets a two. TWO! Burke comes back and focuses on the arm and misses a splash in the corner and gets rolled up for a three! Balls celebrates with the crowd, and is still selling the shoulder. Nice touch. We transition into John Morrison's video package. Did you know Triple H is coming back? Just in case you didn't, they have a video package for you. Backstage, Balls is insulted by the Miz, who insinuates that Balls needs money for a girl like Kelly Kelly. Backstage Kevin Thorn gives a few moments of an interview before being interrupted by Stevie! Ha! Arn Anderson and Mike Rotundo are there again to separate the two wrestlers. Good thing Stevie jumped him, because if I had to listen to Thorn speak for a second more I would have thrown up. Back to the important stuff, Vince is still looking for his bastard. Coach brings in C.M. Punk. Punk says "Hi Vince", but is met with "That's Mr. McMahon." Vince reminds us about Punk beings straight edge and Punk comes back with what else he doesn't do. Punk: There's one other thing I don't do Vince. I don't have dirty unprotected sex with some money-grubbing skank who eventually files a paternity suit against me, which gets me kicked out of my own house which leaves with nothing but a living breathing national disgrace. Nice. John Morrison & The Miz over CM Punk & The Boogeyman After a few minutes of entrances, we're ready to actually star this thing. I can't imagine this ending cleanly, but I've been surprised before. We start with Miz and Punk. Miz gives a shove and Punk gives three round house kicks. Punk tags in Boogeyman and Boogey threatens the Miz with some worms. The Miz runs behind the girls, which prompts Boogey to throw the worms on them. Whoops. After a short commercial break we're back and Punk has control over Morrison, but that doesn't last long. After a few back and forth running reversals, Punk gets Morrison with a high kick. Boogey is tagged in and spits worms on Morrison. Gross. Morrison ducks a shot on the apron and hits Boogey with a standing enziguiri. Boogey goes for the throat, but is cut off short with a boot to the gut. Morrison goes into the corner and Boogey grabs the legs and pulls to launch Morrison into the air and fips and lands on his stomach. Nice. The Miz is tagged in and Boogey has to pull him into the ring. Boogey grabs a leg and Punk tags himself in behind Boogey ad hits a NASTY STANDING ENZIFUIRI to the back of the Miz' head. AWESOME. Punk attacks with some chops and gets a whip tot eh corner reversed. No problem as he raises a boot to block it. Punk goes to the top turnbuckle, but Morrison pushes him and sends him crashing to the floor. Miz puts on some hurtin and sends him back to the ring. The Miz pounds on Punk for a moment and walks him to the heel corner and Morrison is tagged in and Punk and Morrison have each other in a move that I can't quite place but it look similar to what happens right before you drop a neckbreaker. Morrison continues the punishment and tags in the Miz. The Miz gets a two. TWO! and goes for the shoulder/neck. Punk punches out of a submission, but his comeback gets cut short, as usual on WWE programming. The Miz gets a double leg takedown and goes for a catapult into an elbow from Morrison. Morrison only gets a two after a springboard elbow. TWO! A clothesline and another two. TWO! Punk pulls Punk away from the face corner, holds the leg and tags in the Miz, who drops a few elbow and why don't I continue this run on sentence? Morrison tags in and goes for a headlock, which gets fought out of by Punk. Morrison puts Punk on the top turnbuckle, but it gets reversed into a sunset flip/power bomb. Morrison tags in the Miz who cuts off Punk before he can get to Boogey. Punk hits a backslide for a two. TWO! Punk hits a powerslam for a two. TWO! Morrison takes out Boogey and Punk planchas Morrison outside the ring, followed by a springboard splash inside the ring. That gets a two, TWO! and Punk goes for a GTS on the Miz, who tags in Morrison Morrison waits until after Punk hits the GTS and hits an enziguiri and whatever his swinging finisher is called. That's the show for this week. Not bad for a PPV lead off. I'd like to see more ECW matches happening at the PPV, but I suppose that I can't have everything. Or two ECW matches. read less
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ECW on SciFi for August 21st, 2007
Tue August 21 2007
So the show starts with Estrada in the ring, which is full of weapons. With no surprise, the first match with extreme rules, which brings a nice cheer from the crowd. He's gonna handle Justin Robert's duties for this match apparently as he introduces the wrestlers. Big Daddy V over Tommy Dreamer by Samoan drop through a table Dreamer doesn't look very enthusiastic. Remember, this is the guy who didn't blink at fighting the Big Show in the first few weeks of ECW to welcome his to the program. Dreamer starts in on V, but attempts a body slam and gets crushed for his troubles. He goes for the kendo stick but it gets snapped in two. V crushes Dreamer with a chair, wedges a shopping cart in the corner and slams Dreamer, following that up withh tossing him into the cart in the corner. V sets up Dreamer in the corner and runs to splash him, but Dreamer moves out of the way, which gives him time to grab a table, but he gets cut off before he can get back into the ring. V sends him back into the ring and follows with a few headbutts, then grabs the table Dreamer brought into the ring. The table's set up in the middle of the ring and Dreamer's got a trash can, which does NOTHING to V. V throws Dreamer to the ropes and hits a Samoan drop onto the table for the three count. Uh oh. Vince is on the program tonight. Dammit. We're reminded that there's an ECW title match this weekend and this time we're shown a nice little package on C.M. Punk. But back to Vince, who is still looking for his kid with the Coach at his side. Coach hints that there's a wrestler that fits the bill, and it's Balls Mahoney! Balls and Vince have a pretty funny exchange that ends with Vince yelling "I HAVE NO BALLS" at Balls Mahoney. That's pretty good stuff. I'm informed that was shot at Saturday Night's Main Event, but not shown on the broadcast. Oh well, still funny. Elijah Burke vs. Balls Mahoney Balls has pretty good crowd support. Match starts with a combo of headlocks and hammer locks til Balls throws Burke to the ropes and sholder blocks him down. Balls gets Burke from behind in a reverse waist lock and Elijah reverses it into a hammer lock. Balls reverses it, Burke runs to the ropes and gets hit with a HARD arm drag by Balls. Balls goes for the punches, but Burke cuts it short with a punch from underneath and sends hi shoulder first into the ring post. Elijah brings a towel into the ring, but the ref tyakes it away long enough for Burke to get behind him and throw Balls' leg into the post. Elijah hits the hanging elbow and focuses on Balls' shoulder. Burke pulls on Balls arm, which gets the crowd behind him, which of course means his rally will be cut short, and it is. An inside cradle on Burke gets a two after the both miss elbows on the canvas. TWO! Balls hits Burke with some punches and a clothesline, which leads to THE punches, which Balls hits all of them. Burke walks into a big spinebuster, but it only gets a two. TWO! Burke comes back and focuses on the arm and misses a splash in the corner and gets rolled up for a three! Balls celebrates with the crowd, and is still selling the shoulder. Nice touch. We transition into John Morrison's video package. Did you know Triple H is coming back? Just in case you didn't, they have a video package for you. Backstage, Balls is insulted by the Miz, who insinuates that Balls needs money for a girl like Kelly Kelly. Backstage Kevin Thorn gives a few moments of an interview before being interrupted by Stevie! Ha! Arn Anderson and Mike Rotundo are there again to separate the two wrestlers. Good thing Stevie jumped him, because if I had to listen to Thorn speak for a second more I would have thrown up. Back to the important stuff, Vince is still looking for his bastard. Coach brings in C.M. Punk. Punk says "Hi Vince", but is met with "That's Mr. McMahon." Vince reminds us about Punk beings straight edge and Punk comes back with what else he doesn't do. Punk: There's one other thing I don't do Vince. I don't have dirty unprotected sex with some money-grubbing skank who eventually files a paternity suit against me, which gets me kicked out of my own house which leaves with nothing but a living breathing national disgrace. Nice. John Morrison & The Miz over CM Punk & The Boogeyman After a few minutes of entrances, we're ready to actually star this thing. I can't imagine this ending cleanly, but I've been surprised before. We start with Miz and Punk. Miz gives a shove and Punk gives three round house kicks. Punk tags in Boogeyman and Boogey threatens the Miz with some worms. The Miz runs behind the girls, which prompts Boogey to throw the worms on them. Whoops. After a short commercial break we're back and Punk has control over Morrison, but that doesn't last long. After a few back and forth running reversals, Punk gets Morrison with a high kick. Boogey is tagged in and spits worms on Morrison. Gross. Morrison ducks a shot on the apron and hits Boogey with a standing enziguiri. Boogey goes for the throat, but is cut off short with a boot to the gut. Morrison goes into the corner and Boogey grabs the legs and pulls to launch Morrison into the air and fips and lands on his stomach. Nice. The Miz is tagged in and Boogey has to pull him into the ring. Boogey grabs a leg and Punk tags himself in behind Boogey ad hits a NASTY STANDING ENZIFUIRI to the back of the Miz' head. AWESOME. Punk attacks with some chops and gets a whip tot eh corner reversed. No problem as he raises a boot to block it. Punk goes to the top turnbuckle, but Morrison pushes him and sends him crashing to the floor. Miz puts on some hurtin and sends him back to the ring. The Miz pounds on Punk for a moment and walks him to the heel corner and Morrison is tagged in and Punk and Morrison have each other in a move that I can't quite place but it look similar to what happens right before you drop a neckbreaker. Morrison continues the punishment and tags in the Miz. The Miz gets a two. TWO! and goes for the shoulder/neck. Punk punches out of a submission, but his comeback gets cut short, as usual on WWE programming. The Miz gets a double leg takedown and goes for a catapult into an elbow from Morrison. Morrison only gets a two after a springboard elbow. TWO! A clothesline and another two. TWO! Punk pulls Punk away from the face corner, holds the leg and tags in the Miz, who drops a few elbow and why don't I continue this run on sentence? Morrison tags in and goes for a headlock, which gets fought out of by Punk. Morrison puts Punk on the top turnbuckle, but it gets reversed into a sunset flip/power bomb. Morrison tags in the Miz who cuts off Punk before he can get to Boogey. Punk hits a backslide for a two. TWO! Punk hits a powerslam for a two. TWO! Morrison takes out Boogey and Punk planchas Morrison outside the ring, followed by a springboard splash inside the ring. That gets a two, TWO! and Punk goes for a GTS on the Miz, who tags in Morrison Morrison waits until after Punk hits the GTS and hits an enziguiri and whatever his swinging finisher is called. That's the show for this week. Not bad for a PPV lead off. I'd like to see more ECW matches happening at the PPV, but I suppose that I can't have everything. Or two ECW matches. read less
ECW on SciFi for August 14th, 2007
Tue August 14 2007
So you'll see two different sets of thoughts on the show tonight. My thoughts, and the thoughts of my wife, who doesn't watch ECW ever. There's a reason for this, as us wrestling fans don't usually get to see the show from the opinion of someone who is watching for the first time. Yeah, I might complain about move selection for the match, but it's something completely different when someone who hasn't seen John Morrison makes his usual speech and calls it "boring". Maybe every now and again, it's good to hear a fresh voice. His thoughts: Okay, so why are we starting this show with something that happened on RAW last night? This is EXTREME CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING. Not RAW. We're back to the Marilyn Manson this week, which makes twice in a row. I dig the intro, which I couldn't tell you if it is brand new, but it's kinda new. We're starting the show with Jonathan Coachman??? ON RAW??? COME ON. This crap was off my show for so long. We were free from the crap booking of RAW for so so long. The Coach says that he's got some business to attend to. AN ECW GENERAL MANAGER. ARMANDO ESTRADA. Double M spotted Estrada on RAW last night, and I suppose this is why. Estrada gets the "what" treatment as he's reading from his script, staring at the C camera, talking to the people at home, but no one in the arena. He's here to do the signing of the ECW title match between Punk and Morrison. Morrison makes his entrance first, this time, finally without the Johnny Nitro jacket. I suppose he finally saved up enough money to buy himself a few jackets. Estrada announces Punk and my hometown goes nuts for Punk, as expected. We get the WWE staredown over the table. Why do they feel the nee dto do these "signings" in public? Morrison spews his usual crap. He's always got his sun glasses on, maybe so he can read the script a little better. Morrison signs without piquing my interest in the least and Punk gives the contract a look over. Morrison taunts a little bit before Punk reminds him that he won the match last night. Morrison comes back with more boring rhetoric. Punk tells him to "SHUT IT" and actually shows some life on the mic. Punk puts up some nice mic work before signing the contract. The stare down some more before Estrada separates them and tells them both they have matches tonight. Punk has Big Daddy V and Morrison has the Boogeyman. Remember what I said about good matches last week? Forget it. You know, with Punk, Estrada and Morrison, this is looking more and more like OVW. Let's sign Brent Albright and have ourselves some fun! Her thoughts: i would think that vince mcmahon's daughter would be hotter... rob is mad because ecw is broadcasting about an hour from our house. there's an illegitimate child story-line, and i think this is stupid. some guy with cigars in his pocket is ecw's new general manager. his suit is white, and it's faggy looking. his facial hair looks like pubes. i don't get why there's all this talking and bullshit when I'm supposed to be watching wrestling. I'm bored. rob just told me ecw is an hour long... it's 10:05 and feels like forever. John Morrison is a macho hippie, which is just retarded. cm punk looks like some greasy guy that i have nightmares about my daughter bringing home. it looks like he's in a teeshirt and underpants. listening to these guys talk hurts my head. it's like a slutty chick fight, except with deeper voices His thoughts: Big Daddy V over CM Punk by count out Big Daddy V looks more buttery than usual this week. The CT crowd is firmly behind Punk, if they weren't they wouldn't be able to see past V. Punk tries a go behind, but V squashes him into the corner. V sends him to the other corner and slaps, head butts and kicks Punk a few times, but Punk turns around and hits two rising knees, but is caught on the second one and is sent to the canvas in a modified power bomb. Punk goes for a ride in a gorilla press and is dropped to the canvas and V plods around the ring a bit more before screaming a few unintelligible words. V hits a rolling kick on Punk to send him out of the ring. Tazz and Joey are talking about how flexible V is. Gelatin is pretty flexible. Punk tries getting into the ring and is sent back out by V, who simply runs at the ropes and sends Punk into the announce table. And... Punk is counted out? WHAT? CM PUNK JUST LOST BY COUNT OUT? Pretty much Punk was just completely squashed by V shortly before fighting for the ECW championship. How does this make sense? The replay of Big Daddy V running reveal the reason why the tides change. Big Daddy V's always jiggly, always moving boobies. Her Thoughts: the guy with the tattoos on his stomach has stars on his underwear, and so do i. i'm never wearing these drawers again. now there's a fat guy that I don't see the smaller guy with stars on his panties doing a very good job of taking down. yup. ok, there he goes. that was fast. the big fat guy looks angry. ugh! jiggly man boobs! the big guy has a nasty, greasy body, and i'm pretty sure Star-panties is screwed. big guy is holding Star-Panties package and threw him now, and now Star-Panties is being bitch slapped. I kind of have reached the conclusion that this match is sort of stupid, because it's obvious that greasy Man Boobs is able to clobber Star Panties. Yup. Sorry Star Panties. He doesn't look so well. Man boobs is gloating over his win, like beating a guy 200 pounds less than you is something to be proud of. Stupid. His thoughts: Estrada meets with Dreamer, who wants an ECW championship shot after Summerslam. Estrada calls Dreamer lazy and gives him a minute to get to the ring. Tommy prett ymuch has everyone in his way including Stevie, Nunzia, a catering guy and Extreme Expose. When he gest to the ring he's got to fight... BIG DADDY V? Tommy Dreamer vs. Big Daddy V So why do we have to watch fat bastard once more? As expected, V makes short work of Dreamer. This is depressing. The MSG crowd gets Saturday Night's Main Event and the Connecticut crowd gets two Big Daddy V matches? They tease the Morrison vs. Boogeyman match again before revealing Stevie vs. Thorn III. Her Thoughts: Talking. I really hate the "spontaneous" conversation in the hallways. It's kinda dumb. Some guy is going to run to the ring, to fight whoever he finds there. Some Guy is running to the ring in 60 seconds, limping. Ok, you're a big wrestler. Quit limping. Ha! he has to fight Greasy Man Boobs. He's a little bigger than Star Panties, but I doubt this is going to go well. Yup. He's done. Sorry Some Guy. Man Boobs is celebrating again. I'd like to see him take someone his own size. Wait, IS there anyone his own size? His Thoughts: We're back at Mohegan Sun. We relive the moments last week seeing Balls getting his clock cleaned by the Miz. We cut backstage and Kelly Kelly is interrupted by Balls, who attempts to ask her out. The Miz interrupts with Brooke and Layla and... bullies Balls Mahoney? Balls gest serious and scares off the Miz, who takes Kelly with him. Poor Balls. He's going to have to go to Michael Jordan's Steakhouse by himself tonight. Or the Summer Shack, which is excellent. Okay, now were going back to Stevie getting his ass kicked last week backstage before Arn Anderson and IRS stepped in. Stephen Richards over Kevin Thorn by reversed decision He's "Stephen" Richards tonight. thorn overpowers Stevie and slaps him in the corner before Stevie presses on Thorn, giving a few punches before being clotheslines. thorn throws Stevie around the ring a little bit. Stevie nuts up and unloads some punches before being cut short and thrown with a nice body slam. Thorn attacks the back with some knees and hits Stevie with a diving clothesline. Thorn goes for a headlock and Stevie calls out for the yuppies of Connecticut to help him out of it. thorn hits him with a short clothesline and Thorn yells "How dare you beat me?" That's what's known as a "bad attitude". Thorn hits a nasty clothesline and Stevie still kicks out at two. TWO! thorn sends Stevie to the ropes and Stevie comes back with a forearm, them a few kicks and something that looks like a backstabber from the front, but for a two. TWO! Sunset flip for a two. TWO! Thorn hits a big spine buster and... gets a three? What? What's with the endings this week? Thorn hits Stevie with a crucifix power bomb and the ref reverses his decision. So... STEVIE WINS! Three in a row. Color me surprised. Her Thoughts: Mohegan Sun. It's not a nice restaurant. the food there sucks. my PSA of the night. OOO, wrestling again. Now there's a goth looking guy wrestler. He looks like those losers from highschool that are "misunderstood" and "going though a phase". Looser. He's fighting a skinny guy in red boyshorts. Now it's interesting; they look pretty well matched, even though Goth Looser is kind of "doughy". Goth Looser looks like he's kicking the crap out of Red Shorts, and I'm surprised. My money was on the guy who had discernible muscles. Headlock... "How dare you beat me!" declared the Goth Looser. REALLY? Isn't that the point? Red Shorts is coming back, and it's about time! ooo, no. Red Shorts is going down. Goth Looser WON?! What the fuck?! Slowly, Goth Looser caressed his opponent's stomach... homo. What's THAT move called? Ah, now he's kicking his ass some more, even after being declared the winner. Oh, now the decision is reversed by the ref. because of "bad attitude", and angry Goth Looser is glaring through his eyeliner. Ha! I liked Red Shorts best anyway. Too bad he looks like he has a broken neck and can't celebrate. His Thoughts: Elijah Burke is talking with the Coach about his childhood. Blah. Tazz and Joey go into hard sell mode for Summerslam before John Morrison makes his way to the ring. Why does he have a furry coat again? I just got finished saying that he dropped that stupid shit. Her Thoughts: I'm going to be excited, and this is going to be way more fun, if I can see John Cena wrestle. I just saw a promo for something with his face on it, and now my interest is peaked. He's the only wrestler who I know by sight, thanks to a lifesize cutout of him in the local Spencer Gifts. I usually have to restrain myself from humping it when I walk by. You know how some couples have "the list" of famous people you can cheat on should the opportunity arise? John Cena is number one on mine. His Thoughts: We're back and here comes the main event. The Boogeyman over John Morrison by DQ If I were in the audience, I'd be pissed. Boogey is back to his old makeup, not the straight red and black tonight. A shame, cause the black and red was pretty good compared to this Ultimate Wohyah stuff. Boogey hits a firemans carry and leapfrogs Morrison. Morrison gets sent from one corner to the other gets his with a splash and a clothesline. Boogey hits a body slam and a running splash for a two. TWO! Joey compares this McMahon shit to the sword of Damacles. Bleck. Bogey goes up top, but Morrison kicks him to the outside, but throws him back in, but that only gets a two. TWO! Morrison pounds on the ground and goes for another pin. Two. TWO! Oh. My. God. The crowd is chanting for the Boogeyman. It's like they know exactly what I never thought would happen. Morrison locks Boogey's arm, but he powers out, throws a few punches and whips him to the ropes and hits a clothesline, a body slam and a leg drop for a two. TWO! Boogey stalks Morrison, but Morrison thrusts into the throat of the Boogeyman to take control. Morrison climbs up to the top rope and COMPLETELY BLOWS A TOP ROPE CORKSCREW MOONSAULT. He missed him by at least 4 or five feet. I'm talking about a completely blown spot. What does he follow it up with? ANOTHER BLOWN SPOT as Morrison can't get a springboard kick. He cant pin Boogey near the ropes and attempts to drag him away as Boogey holds on tight. This has gotten bad. Morrison shoves the ref and... gets disqualified? Post match Boogeyman goes for the worms and Morrison gets the hell out of Dodge. What a friggin mess of a match. Morrison missed two spots in HUGE ways. That's the kinda thing that costs you titles in the minds of agents kid. Hope you enjoyed the run, cause you just messed up bad on live TV. Her Thoughts: From the "bottomless pit", with worms coming out of his mouth... ugh. I don't think I like this wrestler. He's creepy. Yup. This is disgusting. The Macho Hippie just got a worm spit at him. Really? How much does this guy get paid to drool worms? Does PETA know about this guy? Hey, Macho Hippie! A guy who drools worms is kicking your ass! Maybe your velvet pants are getting in the way. I don't think I can root for either of these guys. They both deserve to have their asses kicked. Where's greasy Man Boobs? I bet he can take both of them. I'm not into the creepy worm drooling, or the faggy velvet pants. Now the Macho Hippie threw himself off of the top rope and MISSED the creepy guy completely. Now he's stumbled off the rope trying to do a fancy foot kick. Maybe he should stay off the ropes? Uh oh. Creepy guy won and now, post-win he has thrown Macho Hippie to the ground and is attempting to give him mouth-to-mouth worms. THAT? Is nasty. Worms? In your mouth? Twice? To spit in another man's mouth? Where I grew up, you got shot for trying stuff like this. Summary Her final thoughts: Ok, this wasn't nearly as horrible as I thought. I was bitching all day about having to watch wrestling, and tried to get out of it, but Rob said that he already made a "special announcement" and said he was really looking forward to having me do his writeup/podcast with him. And we're newlyweds and shit, so I'm doing nice stuff for him. It's still all looks like a bunch of guys running around and slamming each other. I know there are all these technical words for what's happening each second, but to me it was "blah blah blah, fight fight fight" over and over again. Kind of like yesterday when I took Rob purse shopping. We hit the Coach store and he tuned out. I don't think I can ever be "into" wrestling. I just don't get it. My other beef: NO JOHN CENA! Why? WHY? The one night I watch! John, I missed you! Call me, ok? I love you... read less
ECW on SciFi for August 7th, 2007
Wed August 08 2007
So we start the show with a recap of last week's main event. We're back to the Marilyn Manson theme this week. What the hell is going on with this show? Just a little bit of consistency would be nice. We start with the Boogeyman making his way down to the ring and Jesse Guilmette is already in the ring. Uh oh. Boogeyman over a Red Shirt by frogsplash poor Jesse Guilmette. Boogey makes short work of of his with a few clotheslines, a body slam, a power slam and... a frog splash? Post match, we get the usual worm celebration and to add insult to injury, Boogey makes Guilmette eats worms. Striker comes out to attempt to talk sense into Boogey, calling him uncouth and telling him to get out of his life. This lasts just long enough for Big Daddy V to begin clobberin' time on Boogey. Hearing Striker call out for "more Daddy, more is kinda disturbing. Boogey sells the beat down and Big Daddy V does his best Mark Henry impersonation standing over him. Dusty Rhodes: I'll tell ya baby, national television exposure! Jesse Guilmette: The money's right. Dusty Rhodes: Alright Jesse-baby! Get out there and lose to the Boogeyman. Jesse Guilmette: Alright! Let's do it. Dusty Rhodes: And you have to get worms in your mouth at the end. Jesse Guilmette: What? Dusty: Go go go! Time to go on! So the only mention I can find of this dude online is him being trained at Les Thatcher's wrestling school. School teaches wrestling, and, more importantly, how to entertain. He's a footnote in the article, so don't get too excited. I suppose the WWE likes Les' school. We go "moments ago" to watch Big Daddy V dismantling Boogey, so no one's excitement. It's hard for me to root for this joker. I still root for anyone who's fighting against him. Hell, I wanted Guilmette to win the match. Anyway, Elijah Burke comes to the ring and he's looking as upset as ever. Maybe it's cause his braids are different this week. Elijah Burke over Tommy Dreamer by Elijah Express Tazz calls Tommy "all business" as he takes a moment to slap hands with anyone at ringside. I see an error there. Anyway, collar and elbow to start with Elijah getting the advantage, but Dreamer fights out with some kicks and knocks him out of the ring with a clothesline. Tommy follows suit and Elijah slams him off of the ring apron. Elijah throws Dreamer into the ring and stomps the back for fun and Elijah hits the hanging elbow, this week without almost falling over the other side of the top rope. That only gets a one and goes to the surfboard. Dreamer turns that into a back suplex and follows it up with some punches. Dreamer locks on the Texas Cloverleaf. I mark out and Burke grabs the bottom ropes. Dreamer keeps holding onto the legs and catapults Elijah to the turnbuckle. Tommy goes for the DDT and Elijah drops to the ground. Elijah goes to the ropes as Tommy pursues and gets a boot to the face as Burke flips over the ropes and goes to the top turnbuckle. Dreamer throws a few haymakers and goes for a superplex, but Elijah reverses it and pulls Tommy's neck down over the top rope. The kneepads are down and Elijah hits the Express and gets a three count easy as Elijah solidifies himself as the #3 ma on the show (following Morrison and Punk). We go to the back to the #1 man in the company who gives his thoughts on his 15 minute match with Punk tonight. His thoughts are that he's... well a bunch of rhetorical statements. He thinks Punk is excited to have 15 minutes of Morrison in the ring, but the rest of us are bored after 2 minutes of Morrison speaking. It's the Miz and the Nitro Girls! Everyone celebrate! Wait, did I just say celebrate? I meant sulk. The girls sit ringside and the Miz gets a mic. He does the usual "chick magnet" schtick until Balls' music hits. The Miz over Balls Mahoney by Reality Check Round II. Remember when Balls beat Masato Tanaka at One Night Stand II? Shame they haven't let him win other matches. Balls goes to the Balls punches quick, but gets kicked a few times and knocked out of the ring. Kelly helps him up slowly and Balls gives a little grin until the Miz pulls him back into the ring. Miz hits the Reality Check and this thing's over. The Reality Check is a pretty ice series of a knee lift and a neck breaker. KElly Kelly looks a bit upset over Balls' misfortune. We go backstage to the #2 man in the company who's discussing how he's gonna approach the match tonight. He throws out the rhetoric about being straight edge and his only addiction being competition and that's about it. They replay Vince's return to RAW. There were two good things about RAW last night. The first was Santino's line of "I am in terrible pain" and the second was Vince telling Paul London to "keep smiling". They replay the unlikely wins of Stevie Richards and they go backstage to Stevie! He gets about two sentences in before he;s absolutely clobbered by Kevin Thorn. This lasts a few moments before it's broken up by a few referees, Arn Anderson and Mike Rotundo. John Morrison makes his way out to the ring and now his music has lyrics. I can't make any of them out, probably to my benefit. Quick commercial break... By the way, I know this probably isn't the place for it, but Anderson Cooper 360 uses the old La Resistance theme. Check it out some day, it's entertaining. I wonder if they paid for it? CM Punk over John Morrison by GTS with 0:05 remaining So this is a 15 minutes of fame match. Punk doesn't even have to win. Considering it's 10:45, there's a good chance that it's gonna go the full 15. Match starts and Morrison makes a point of pointing out the clock... seemingly wasting time? Them Punk makes a point to point out the crowd. Collar and elbow to start all around the ring, it gets broken up in the corner and more facing down. 14:00 left. Punk gets an arm bar and turns it into a seated hammer lock. Morrison gets up and grabs a leg , but gets kicked off by Punk. More stare down and Punk goes behind and gets a takeover into a front chancery as we hit the 13:00 mark. Morrison reverses it and can only get a one and goes into a rear choke. Punk powers out and sweeps the leg and slaps in a rear choke of his own. Morrison goes tot he ropes at 12:00. Morrison throws some punches and surfboards Punk using his hair to stare at the clock. Morrison gets a few kicks in and gets a whip to the corner reversed at 11:00. Punk hits a drop kick NASTY on Morrison into the corner and can only get a two. TWO! Punk hits a few kicks and twists a hammerlock into a clothesline. Morrison slams Punk at 10:00 and hits his swinging leg drop on Punk. Punk goes and gets kicked in the gut by Morrison a few times before clearing Morrison out of the ring with a clothesline and follows it up with a plancha. Punk gets Morrison into the ring at 9:00, but Morrison follows that by drop kicking Punk to the floor. Morrison pulls Punk back, but Punk suplexes Morrison to the floor from the ring apron! We head to commercial with 8:00 left. We're back at 4:00 and Morrison's got Punk in what looks like a Cobra Clutch on Punk, a two count (TWO!) and a leg lariat by Morrison. Morrison goes to the second rope and misses a corkscrew moonsault. At 3:00 Punk throws some sloppy punches, hits a few kicks and a clothesline. This is followed with some knees, a whip to the corner, the knee in the corner and a bulldog. Punk puts an exclaimation point on it with a springboard clothesline, but only gets a two. TWO! At 2:00 Punk rolls Morrison up and Punk hits a standing enziguiri for a two. TWO! Morrison ducks a clothesline and hits a modified backbreaker and neckbreaker for a two. TWO! A few punches later Punk tries for a sunset flip and Morrison goes for a crab unsuccessfully and goes for a catapult. Punk stands n the ropes and tries for a sunset flip and gets a two at 1:00. TWO! Punk has Morrison up for the GTS but Morrison elbows his way out of it. Mirrison blows a springboard enziguiri, but because of the time crunch he just rears back and kicks Punk in the face. We've got :30 left and Morrison goes for a pin. TWO! :20 and Morrison gets reversed into the GTS. At :10 Punk hits the GTS and goes for the pin with 0:05 left on the clock. Punks' heading to Summerslam for a title shot and we just had ourselves a great main event between these two guys. read less
ECW on SciFi - July 17rd, 2007
Tue July 17 2007
Originally posted atInside Pulse Looks like we're keeping Marilyn Manson as the music for ECW. I think they could have done better, but I guess that they need to promote something that's not Drowning Pool. Joey and Tazz try to sell us on some "reporters" being outside the champ's locker room. Someone walks out to say that this is the last time that we'll see Johnny Nitro on ECW. I suppose they're trying to make people stay tuned later. I don't think it'll work, I think most people will be checking the internet after the show later. CM Punk over Elijah Burke by GTS Wow, opening with this one? Interesting choice, but I guess they're going to try to keep us in suspense, even though no one really cares and people want to see Punk wrestle. Staredown to start as both men acknowledge the crowd's chanting for Punk. Burke challenges Punk to start in the middle of the ring. Punk lets Burke know that the crowd is firmly behind him. Burke circles CM Punk and they go into a collar an elbow and Burke powers Punk into the corner. They circle on the ropes and they get tangled and separate. both men are slow to get into a test of strength and Punk pulls Burke's arm around with one arm, then Punk lifts Burke and drops him while still twisting the wrist. Punk grabs Burke in an arm bar, then rolls him through by his head and drops some knees on the arm while still holding the arm bar. Punk holds Burke's arm in a submission before Burke powers out and knock Punk down with what looked like a push. A push? Nah, he hooked the leg and then missed a short elbow. Punk goes back to the arm (which will REALLY stop the Elijah Express, right?) and kicks Burke in the ribs a few times before throwing Burke shoulder first into the turnbuckle while in a hammer lock. Punk can only get a one. Punk gets a body slam and a short leg drop for a two. TWO! Punk goes back to the shoulder as Burke powers out and pushes Punk to the corner. Clean break, then a boot to Punk's midsection. Burke pounds on Burke, gets a snap mare and finally hits that short elbow for a two. TWO! A few more forearms to the back by Burke before Punk reverses a suplex attempt for a two. TWO! Back to a triangle submission on the arm and Burke powers out and gets a whip reversed into the opposite corner, but drills Punk with a boot reversal. Boot vs. Face. Face rarely wins. Burke sets Punk up near the ropes and jumps to sit on the top rope and pulls Punk out with his legs. Both men are out, so we're going to commercial. We're back and Punk is hurt and Burke is going after the leg with a single leg Boston crab. The crowd is behind Punk, but that doesn't help him get to the ropes. Burke cuts the crab short and drops a few elbows and forearms on the lower back of Punk. That can only get a two. TWO! Burke goes back to the legs and this time he grabs both legs and cinches in the Boston crab. Punk powers out and drags himself ALMOST to the ropes and teases a tap out. Instead, he grabs the ropes. I think he should have tried that first. Burke goes back to Punk's legs, but gets kicked instead. In the corner, Burke tries a few punches, but they're reversed by Punk as Punk battles out and hits a few kicks for good measure. Burke cuts off Punk's attempts at something off the ropes with a punch in the midsection and an uppercut to the side of the head. That gets a two. TWO! Burke drops CM Punk into a seated position and hits a shoulder tackle to Punk's back. Burke puts Punk into a surfboard, and no one wins with this move. Punk nearly turns it around, but Burke picks him up into a backbreaker. This gets a two. TWO! And another two. TWO! TWO! Burke gets frustrated with Scott Armstrong and sends Punk to the ropes chest first to hit a few forearms to the lower lumbar region. This is a slower match than these two normally wrestle. Perhaps it's because they taped Smackdown first and the crowd isn't as hot for ECW as it normally would be. Burke grabs the arm, steps under and gives Punk a body slam. He goes to grab one leg as Punk hits a few kicks from the laying down position. Punk hits a few more roundhouse kicks followed by a clothesline, a back elbow and finishes the sequence by pancaking Burke. Punk hits a roundhouse to the chest, but only gets a two. TWO! Punk goes for a suplex and only gets it halfway before Burke turns it into a back suplex and covers Punk for a two. TWO! Punk grabs Burke and plants him with a DDT for another two. TWO! Punk misses a slow punch and Burke hits a german and can't bridge the back and has to roll around and hook a leg for a two. TWO! After some taunting for Punk to get up he lays into him with some punches and a clothesline or two until Punk reverses it into the GTS. One. Two. Three. If you've noticed by now, I usually cover Punk's matches move for move, cause usually they're worth noting. It's been a while since he's fought someone he hasn't beaten nearly half a dozen times. Post match, Tazz and Joey talk up "Big Daddy V", who is up next. After a long promo for the Cena/Lashley match at the Bash at the Beach, we're finally back. And we're back with out teacher, Matt Striker. He's still Matt Striker, he's still our teacher. Last week he gave the Boogeyman a lesson in redemption. With that, he introduced "Big Daddy V" and once again the only man in the WWE with four boobs comes to ringside. It's a good thing that they keep pushing this young talent. Big Daddy V over a Red Shirt SQUASH. Literally. This just in:Marcus Cor Von is not at the Smackdown/ECW taping in Laredo, Texas tonight. All references to the scheduled Cor Von vs. CM Punk match have been pulled from WWE.com's ECW on Sci Fi preview as I have been told that match will be changed. No idea yet what may have caused Cor Von to miss the taping. He was in New Orleans at last week's taping, but not utilized. (PWINSIDER.COM)I wonder what that's all about? I suppose we'll find out soon. If you are really curious, Big Daddy V's finisher looks to be a Bossman Slam. The Miz is in the ring and declares himself a chick magnet. I guess they're going with this angle. He says that every woman in the arena wants him. The Miz and I share a problem in this regard. checks dig him and their men fear him. The Miz calls out Extreme Expose, and the Nitro Girls saunter out. Apparently their "surprise" for hte Miz is dancing with him in a chair. The song is "Like A Boy" by Ciara. The Miz looks impressed, the live audience doesn't. Oh, a change, they rip each others shirts off to reveal bras before giving the Miz lap dances. I have a fear that this angle will end with a match between the Expose girls. Kevin Thorn over Tommy Dreamer by throwing him shoulder first into the post06/19/07 - Thorn over Dreamer 04/10/07 - Thorn over Dreamer 02/06/07 - Thorn over Dreamer 10/10/06 - Dreamer over Thorn 10/03/06 - Thorn over DreamerWith a record of 1 for 5, I wonder how this one's gonna go for Dreamer. They lock up and do the brawling thing. Dreamer maintains control and Thorn pulls DDreamer's left shoulder over the ropes and thorn's got control. Wow. Dreamer is selling from last week? That's called SELLING LIKE A CHAMP. Thorn goes after the shoulder more. They go through the usual back and firth between these two, nothing really new here, although Dreamer does pul off a frog splash. Not five star, maybe three stars. There's a debate going on over matches like this and the CM Punk vs. Stevie Richards match from last week. Personally, I can't really get into a squash match like these, especially when there's a long history of these two going head to head with the same result over and over again. To some degree, the end result doesn't completely ruin the match. For an example, you could look at just about any Hulk Hogan Wrestlemania match, but at the same time, those matches are big league matches and not filler matches on the WWE's "C" show. I don't care how competitive the Punk/Richards match was, the conclusion wasn't going to be different than most of the previous matches. We cut back to Nitro's locker room and the press agent walks out of the ring and all of the reporters follow him. Wait a second, isn't Nitro giving the press conference? Rey Mysterio's coming back, did you know? The press guy is in the ring and is talking about Johnny Nitro's history in the WWE. He's got as much charisma as Lashley in that ring. Johnny Nitro won't be seen in ECW again because... He's changing his name. Yeah. Changing his name. And his music and look as well. It's the same idea, but more Stillwater in the look. What's Nitro's name going to be? John Morrison. That's what he says his birth name is. LIES!!! Although now that I'm looking at him, he's got the Jim Morrison hair going on. Check out John Hennigan's Wikipedia page for more answers on this. Nitro talks about Punk's nickname for a bit as Punk comes out and Morrison sucker punches Punk and we'll see these two again at the Bash I suppose. read less
ECW on SciFi - July 3rd, 2007
Tue July 03 2007
Alright. Let's do this. LET THE BODIES HIT THE... Wait a second. OLD SKOOL ECW MUZIK!!! Yeah, that's right, it's the old school music for whatever reason. I suppose they thought that "Let the bodies hit the Floor" was no longer fitting in with the kinder gentler WWE image. For those of you who care, the iPhone is awesome and totally lives up tot he hype. AT&T isn't great, but the hardware is awesome. Johnny Nitro over Tommy Dreamer by corkscrew neck breaker I think we all know how this is gonna end. Nitro hodls up the title to gloat to Dreamer before handing it to someone at ringside. Shame they're turning him into Orton personality wise. Nitro gets the early advantage over Dreamer, who is looking especially old today. I think it's a change in his hair? Eh, whatever. Nitro keeps control over Nitro, who makes the mistake of going up top once Dreamer is on his feet. Dreamer locks in an abdominal stretch, throwing some forearms into Nitro's abs, which are reaching Lex Luger status as they announce he's only got 4% body fat. Nitro's strategy finally reveals itself as he's going to target the arm of Dreamer. The crowd cares a bit more about Nitro then I do, as they muster up a weak "Nitro Sucks" chant. Tommy hits a Cactus clothesline and both men are outside, but Dreamer's got the advantage. He throws Nitro in, reminds us all that his arm hurts and teases the suplex to the outside. Nitro drops Dreamer over the top rope and hits him with a drop kick. Dreamer's in pain on the outside and we're heading towards commercials. We're back and Nitro is still working over the arm and shoulder. Nitro does some damage with three roundhouse kicks to Dreamer's shoulder. Shame I can't remember the dude's finisher, but I hope he wins with something on the arm tonight. Leg drop to the shoulder, but it only gets a two. TWO! Nitro grabs Dreamer, but it only gets a two again. TWO! AGAIN! Dreamer starts looking a little frustrated and fights back with one arm and Nitro cuts him short with a nice move that I can't name. Nitro's wrestling a picture perfect match in regards to his strategy. He found an opening and kept on it, escalating the moves. Nitro hits a knee drop from the top rope onto Dreamer's shoulder. He held Dreamer under the knee in another impressive move on the shoulder. Nitro goes for a springboard shining wizard, but Dreamer ducks and hits a clothesline to buy him some time. Nitro charges and Dreamer raises a boot, followed by some punches. Dreamer manages to hit a one armed fall away slam, but that only gets a two. TWO! Nitro is set up in the tree of woe and gets drilled with a drop kick. Tommy goes for a DDt, but Nitro pulls the arm down and hits the corkscrew neck breaker (oh yeah, that's the move) for a three count. A nice match all in all. Nitro grabs the title and heads to the aisle and does his best facial Randy Orton impression. A RAW recap sends us off into the commercial break and apparently Lashley vs. Cena is going to headline the Great American Bash. I can only echo the thoughts of GRUT when I say that it might not be the best idea to push someone who is inhuman in physique. And not inhuman in the Khali kinda way. This is in that suspicious kinda way. Ugh. The Boogeyman gets a video package and now I can't get those moments back in my life. This is followed by a CM Punk video package and.. commercials. Extreme Expose returns next week. Have you noticed them missing? Me either. Joey say right now they're going to show us the ECW title match from Vengeance. Wait. What? Replaying the video from Vengeance? Johnny Nitro over CM Punk by swinging neck breaker Read the original recap at InsidePulse LIVE Vengeance Coverage. How are they going to make this work with all of the mentions of Benoit during this match? I've got two words for ya: Revisionist History "WE WANT BENOIT" becomes "ECW". Here's my thoughts: They've entirely re-dubbed Tazz and Joey and rebuilt the crowd reactions. This is pretty standard practice in the WWE, but usually they won't be so blatant about it as to re-air the match on TV within two weeks. If anyone who saw the original broadcast could back this up or not, please shoot me an e-mail. I know the "BORING" chants are missing besides the "WE WANT BENOIT" chants. So all in all, there's only 4 wrestlers on the show tonight. Video promo for the Miz, but we still haven't seen the guy on ECW TV yet. As promised, we're heading into the main event. CM Punk over Kevin Thorn by a standing enziguiri Lockup to start and Punk goes behind. Thorn attempts to fight out with some elbows, but Punk ducks out of the way. Thorn eventually connects with a few and Punk is dazed, which leaves him open for a few more vampire punches. Thorn goes for a body slam, but Punk jumps over and sweeps the back of the legs to get Thorn down and hits him with a leg drop quickly. thorn gets up and Punk hits two knees to the chest and a head drag (best name I can think of for it) followed by the roundhouse kick to the back of Thorn. Ow. Punk only gets a two. TWO! Thorn is up and powers Punk into the corner. Punk is whipped to the opposite corner and Punk jumps over him and chops down the tree with a few roundhouse kicks to the thigh and three to the chest. Punk hits a running knee, but that only gets a one. Punk holds a headlock but is thrown into the ropes by Thorn, he was supposed to go between the ropes, but he hit them instead, which meant thorn had to get him out another way. On the outside, Thorn powers Punk back first into the barrier and then the ring apron. thorn hits a few times before breaking up the count. On his way back out Punk kicks out the ankle of Thorn to knock him down while on the ring apron. Punk hits a slingshot sommerault senton and were headed to commercials. We're back and Punk has control of Thorn. Thorn powers out into the corner and hits Punk a few times, then throws him to the other side of the ring. That hasn't worked once tonight, and it still doesn't as Punk attempts to jump over a charging Thorn. Thorn grabs him and dumps him throat first onto the ropes. Thorn hits a double axe handle, but that only gets a one. Perhaps out of frustration, Thorn slaps on a headlock, which gives Punk the opportunity to power out. Power out he does with a few elbows. Punk runs to the ropes and gets flap jacked followed by a clothesline, but that only gets a two. TWO! Thorn stretches the back with a knee in Punk's back and pulling back on the chin, as the crowd starts the 80's slow clap for Punk as he powers out and hits some elbows, but Thorn throws Punk to the corner once more and Punk actually lands there, but gets a boot up quick and Thorns face meets boot. Boot vs. Face. Face rarely wins. Thorn staggers back and gets another boot to the face. Punk attempts a springboard cross body, but thorn dumps him in the corner instead. Thorn is look a the top turnbuckle and that's no good. He attempts something, but gets knees to the chest. Punk drop toe holds Thorn in the corner and hits his series of strikes and finishes with a flying forearm. A few clotheslines later, Punk goes for ten punches in the corner. He gets to six and sends him to the other corner and hits the rising knee. I really think it'd have a bigger effect on the crowd. He hits the bulldog, but only gets a two. TWO! Punk goes up top, but Thorn stops that and Thorn attempts Original Sin, but Punk gets out of it and pulls Thorn's back across the ropes. {Punk hits a springboard flying forearm, but that only gets a two. TWO! Punk is frustrated, and this time he attempts a Go to Sleep, but thorn elbows out and hits a clothesline. Thorn looks for a crucifix, but Punk hits a standing enziguiri for the three count! Nitro comes out to distract Punk, Thorn attacks from behind. Punk battles back as Nitro gets to the ring, but Nitro avoids Punk and taunts him with the title. Would have been nice to have a different match besides the Vengeance one tonight. You have to wonder why they would air that match rather than a live one. I suppose that maybe they're trying to show what happened in the new post Benoit WWE, but that could have been accomplished with a recap or music video rather than the entire match being shown. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some cupcakes to frost. read less
